Hola! It's about time to update the profile again, isn't it?
My name is Laura. A lot of people get mixed up and call me Lauren instead of Laura. If I could've named myself, I probably would've picked some beautiful, mysterious, weird name like Anastasia or Layla, but Laura's workin' out pretty well for me at the moment.
I live in Virginia, USA. I really want to travel when I'm older and have enough money, but I honestly wouldn't want to live anywhere but here. I've made so many amazing memories here and the weather(to me) is perfect. It's absolutely gorgeous here in the fall and one of the most peaceful things for me to do is to take a long walk in the fields or forest behind my house. I live in a small town and all my relatives live fairly close to me so get togethers are very common for us. We're a close family, which I absolutely love! There's 8 of us kids, which most people are shocked by. I've gotten pretty used to the reactions by now. I most likely won't have as many kids because, being the second oldest, I can see how difficult it can be sometimes and I don't think I'd be able to handle it all, but I wouldn't trade in my siblings for anything in the world. Like all brothers and sisters, we get into arguments and fights sometimes, but I love them all and I love spending time with them. I could see myself getting very lonely without them.
I'm a sophomore in highschool, so I'm 15. I've been homeschooled my entire life and this is my first year going into a public school. I'm a little bit nervous, but excited to begin a new journey with new people. I've experienced one method of schooling, now I can experience another and hopefully it'll be a pleasant one. Sometimes I feel so old and I think about just how much of my life I've lived and other times I feel incredibly immature and still just a baby. Usually I feel like the latter. I actually feel very good about the fact that I'm still a teenager with so many choices and opportunities laid out for me. Sometimes, when I'm lying in bed at night, I feel like just not growing up. Just wanting to stay in this carefree time between childhood and adulthood with some responsibilities, but not enough to weigh me down. Of course, that's not possible. I'll grow up eventually; get a job, have to pay taxes, get insurance, buy a house, get married, maybe raise a family. It's exciting, but terrifying at the same time. I do know that it's all in God's hands and He'll carry me through whatever trials I face. And I have an amazing family and a great group of friends to help me through the hard times I know I'll have.
The best way I could think to describe my personality would be that I'm very quiet around people I don't know/am not comfortable with but I can also be very talkative and outgoing when I want to be or when I feel comfortable around you. Even though I'm quiet, I love being around people and I usually hate being alone unless I'm tired or stressed out. I care about people and I hate drama and tend to stay as far away as possible from it. I try not to hold grudges or judge people before I know them very well. I trust people very easily; sometimes, too easily and too much. Some people have called me naive before and I'm really not sure if that's true or not. I don't think I am, but then other times, I feel extremely stupid for falling for a joke or for trusting someone I shouldn't. So maybe I am naive. I would hope that that isn't the first thing someone notices about me. I'd rather be thought about as someone who's smart and not easy to trick, but people are confusing and people lie and change their minds, so I really don't know how I could say I know everything a person will do and who I should trust. I try to trust people I think should be trusted and I'm wary around the people I'm not sure about, but some people call me a pushover, so I guess it doesn't take much to make me fall for something.
There are some things I won't back down on though; my faith in God, my friends and my family, secrets I've promised to keep...I worry a lot about what others think of me. I've tried to make myself stop, but it's so easy to criticize myself when someone says something about my appearance or my attitude. It's hard when all you want is to be excepted by people. I shouldn't be like that, but I am and I honestly wish I could just not care as much. Not care who likes me and who doesn't, not care if the guy I like noticed me today, not care about putting on makeup or making my hair and clothes look just right to please others and not a single minute of it being for my benefit or my happiness.
I tend to pick apart every part of my body that I don't like(there's not many parts of me that I actually do like). It could be anything from my shoe size to my waist size to the size of my thighs to my nose or my chin or my forehead to my eye color and the list goes on and on. People have called me beautiful before and I try to believe it but I can't. I don't think I'm ugly. It's not like that. I just don't find myself attractive. I don't think of myself as a very fun or exciting person to hang out with and nothing really special. I'm not fishing for complements, this is just truly the way I feel about myself. I'm not asking for pity or for more people to assure me that I'm "beautiful the way I am". I just feel like I can trust you guys enough that I can tell you how I feel about myself without sugar-coating anything.
There's been low times in my life and there's been amazing, happy, fun times in my life and I honestly wouldn't change any of them. You can't have or really appreciate the good without the bad and, from my experience, the good lasts much longer than the bad.
My interests are music, theater, and singing. I'm not sure how good I am at any of those things, but I do enjoy doing them. Something I think I'd like to be when I'm older is a missions worker or someone who travels to countries like Africa or China to help people, especially younger kids or teenagers. I have "The End It Movement" linked in my links, which is an organization that I'm really passionate about and, hopefully, one day I'll be able to take a bigger part in it. It's an amazing organization, so you might want to click on it and find out more about it. :) My life's dream is to make a difference in people's lives for the better. Not for my own benefit and not to make myself look like some saint or something, but just to let others know that there is someone who loves them. I can't even imagine how many people who are forced into horrible situations have completely lost hope in people and in everything else they ever believed and trusted in and I want more than anything to help bring that hope and trust and joy back into their life, whoever they may be. Just knowing that I somehow played a part in changing a person's life would make me the happiest, most blessed person in the world.
[/color=blue]So, this has gotten to be quite long and if you've bothered to read this much about me, then let's just say you now know more about me then some of my friends in real life! How does that make you feel? ;) Special? Thought so!
If you've skipped most of it and are just reading the last bit of all this, then that's ok, too! We can still be friends! We don't need to know everything about each other. :) NOW! Here's some fun facts about me and some awesome gifs and thing-a-ma-bobs and all that fun stuff! Thanks so much for coming along and I hope you have the most amazing day! Ta-ta!
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